Learning to make mindful decisions can save you a lot of stress in your business and life by preventing you from wasting time, effort, and emotional energy.  As a female leader, you must be able to make calm, clear-headed decisions in a timely fashion and not be weighed down by fear, distraction and second-guessing yourself.

A mindful decision is a decision you make consciously. It draws from this invisible source of wisdom, called your intuition.

By using your intuition, this direct line to Source/Universe/God, you’ll feel much more confident in your decision. 

A mindful decision is the opposite of a reactive, subconscious choice made for you by your automatic habits and unquestioned beliefs.

When you make a mindful decision, you empower yourself because you’re choosing, regardless of the outcome. You’re acknowledging there is a risk if you go down a certain path, and you’re willing to take the risk.

A woman wearing a white sleeveless doing yoga, folding her hands to pray. The words over the images are "When you make a mindful decision, you empower yourself because you're choosing, regardless of the outcome. You're acknowledging there is a risk if you go down a certain path, and you're willing to take the risk. Angie Monko Life Coach for intuitive Woman Leaders"

In this blog, raise your awareness and learn 4 reasons why it’s hard for female leaders to make mindful decisions. In next week’s blog, I’ll discuss strategies and techniques to overcome this resistance.

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Understanding Your Decision Making Process


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Recognize Your Decision-Making Style


Do you tend to make decisions quickly and impulsively, in a knee-jerk reaction sort of way? You may feel anxious if you sit with a decision too long. It’s almost like a hot potato–you feel the need to pass it along, get it off of your plate. You want to close the loop so you don’t have to think about it anymore. In other words, there is a tension in the land of being in limbo or undecided.

Or do you tend to make decisions methodically, very calculatedly and slowly? If so, you’ve probably been accused of being an over-thinker. Unlike the impulsive decision maker, you feel pressured when you have to make a decision quickly.

Or maybe you tend to avoid decisions altogether, because you don’t want to hurt people’s feelings, or you don’t want to feel uncomfortable for whatever reason.

Maybe you don’t avoid decisions, but fall somewhere in between the quick and the slow decision maker.  They are all OK. The idea here is to know thyself.

Examine Your Beliefs and Biases

How you grew up and what you came to believe have a huge impact on how you’ll make decisions. You’ll have a harder time making decisions if you grew up feeling insecure and had critical parents. Further, it will feel more risky to make decisions if you have performance anxiety and believe you can never get things perfect enough.

On the other hand, making decisions may come more easily to you if you had (have) loving, supportive, parents who encouraged you to trust yourself, make mistakes, and get back up to try again after dusting yourself off.

Your unique personality and human design also play into how you make decisions.

The variety of beliefs that will impact your ability to make good decisions is vast and is beyond the scope of this blog.  Suffice it to say that your beliefs directly impact your decision process in every way possible.

Understand the Impact of Emotions on Decision-Making

Just as with beliefs, emotions have a tremendous impact on what you decide and how quickly.  If you wake up feeling depressed, how likely are you to take action on things you want? Likewise, your emotions can wreak havoc on your confidence and keep you stuck in indecision and confusion.

When you feel negative emotions, they can hijack the best laid plans. Emotional management is really time management since the emotions dictate what you will or won’t do.

Intense feelings like shame, guilt, anger, and fear can keep you stuck in a pattern of non-action, non-decision, rendering you helpless to create the life you desire.

Identify the Source of Stress and Anxiety

What is causing you to feel stressed out about a decision?  Do you fear failing?

I heard Dr. Alex Loyd, the creator of the healing codes, at one of his workshops say, “The moment you make a goal your body goes into a state of anxiety, fearing all the ways you could fail.”

The source of your stress and anxiety when making a decision is a false belief that you are inadequate and incapable of achieving what you REALLY want in life. Since the prime directive of the subconscious mind is to keep you safe, it doesn’t want you to make a decision about important matters, only to be hurt by repeated painful disappointments.

What Can You Do About This Decision Difficulty


Do not give up on your dreams or desires. You CAN make a change by changing your beliefs and subsequent emotions.  The subconscious mind will shift when it knows you’re ready and serious to do something different. The Latin root of the word decide means literally “to cut off.”

So you cut off other alternatives when you make a decision. You can pray to God or the Universe and ask, “If I’m meant to go this way, increase my desire for it. If I’m not, then decrease my desire.”

In next week’s blogs, I’ll cover techniques and strategies to help you overcome decision-making difficulties.



Your unique decision making style, your beliefs and emotions, and the fact that it is stressful to make decisions and possibly fail, all contribute to why making decisions is hard for the female leader.

Add to this the fact that women are more notorious for pleasing people and avoiding decisions altogether, and you have a recipe for disaster when it comes to leadership. There is a better way.  Look for techniques to become a better decision maker next week.

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If you’d like support in becoming a mindful decision maker/leader, register for my upcoming Heal Your Heart Online Retreat.  Being a mindful leader begins with healing the issues of the heart.  Yes you heard that right.  These underlying issues of the heart define your identity, and until you begin to see yourself through a new lens of enough-ness, you won’t have the impact you know you could have as a leader.
Much Love,
Angie Monko,
Life Coach for Intuitive Women Leaders