Dawn Ferguson interviewed me a few weeks ago on the topic
of Change Your Story, Change Your Life.
In this interview, check out the 10 minute hypnosis I do on feeling not enough
and how to begin to feel that everything is going to be OK, feeling
supported by nature in the metaphor of a conversation with a massive
tree, Mr. Old Oak.
Listen to my presentation/interview (you’ll need to download it)
We can become very afraid to hope and dream out of self-protection
because we’ve been hurt, disappointed and jaded by life.
So how can we deal with our pain and move forward? Eckhart
Tolle calls the painful emotions the pain body. Your pain may be
mostly up in the head (over analyzing things), in your heart due
to fear of rejection, or in your gut due to fear of being attacked
and persecuted, etc.
Your pain body is unconscious. I’ve learned I have a big pain body
and can easily relate to others’ pain by offering them compassion.
It started for me when I was 6 years old and lost my Aunt Elaine due
to cancer when she was 16.
We shared the same birthday (9/23), and so for 10 years I feared
I’d die when I turned 16. It created a huge imprint.
And I lived in a turbulent household growing up with a father
who mistreated my mom. It was a roller coaster, never knowing
when he’d erupt on her.
Our pain body wants bad things to happen because that is its
comfort zone. It draws more drama and distraction to it. And
we attract what we are, not who we want to become. So we must
heal this pain. How do we do that?
1) Become self-aware with self-love around that
2) Realize that your pain isn’t a problem as it’s always been
3) Convert the energy from the pain into empowering energy.
The bigger the pain body, the more the opportunity to transmute
the energy into something beautiful. So this is good news! We can
use our pain to create something amazing rather than use it for self-pity.
After losing my 22 year old daughter, Maddie, 2 years ago, my pain
body was having a field day! I was immersed in self-pity and pain,
and I’m slowly finding my way out of that. Maddie will always be a
part of me, AND I can move forward.
We can use parts therapy to get in touch with the various aspects
of ourselves. We all have various parts within us. Think of them
like a bunch of various characters within a story, and we have a
relationship with each character.
How can we (all of our parts) work together as a team to tell a
better story? Per Dawn, we can ask ourselves, “What is the discussion
we REALLY wanted to have?”
We easily avoid these authentic, vulnerable conversations with self
because they make us uncomfortable, and a part of us prefers the
drama and distraction.
If we’re considering whether to stay or go in a relationship, one part of
us may have our foot out the door because we want to run away from our
fears of intimacy, and another part may feel guilty for wanting to leave.
I help women to find what is in their highest good in this situation. The
fastest route to clarity is through continual self-love and acceptance.
If you’re ready to tell a new story, and you’ll know you’re ready because
you’ll feel called to do something different and create a new habit,
then register for a 2 day women’s retreat coming the last weekend of
June called Let Go Of What They Think.